Photostory Friday - My Little Man Is 3

There are so many aspects in my life that seem to have zoomed past. All of a sudden, today is Aaron's 3rd Birthday. The funny thing is that the past 3 years with Aaron has moved at just the right pace. Yes, my days are often excruciatingly long but maybe that is a good thing. I have LOTS of (extra) time with him to cherish.

Being a mother, and the stay-at-home variety is definitely the job for me. I wouldn't want to miss any part of his life. He is such an amazing little guy and I am grateful for the bond that we have developed. I'm so proud of the little person that he has grown into - loving, caring, funny, cheeky and sensitive.

Here are some of my favourite photos of him:

This was his favourite sleeping position. Even if we put him on his back, he'd roll over and do this. He still sleeps this way now...


He was really easy to feed...


First contact with grass...


I think this is my absolute favourite. Just look at those innocent eyes...


He loves his pencil and paper...


And also his guitar...



Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Happy Birthday Aaron!

Aaron needs to slow down

I know that all of these would have been developing gradually but they feel like overnight developments when I suddenly realize how many there are.

...Shouting numbers randomly in Indonesian whenever he hears us using any numbers. It doesn't matter what language we're speaking or whether we are talking about time, prices or distance. He just starts shouting random Indonesian numbers.

...Wriggling out of my arms and onto the floor so that he can walk independently when we're shopping. He then walks through the aisles touching the clothes and saying "Nice"

...Calling out to various family members and inviting them to play. Taking them by the hand and leading them to the play area of choice. Bringing a book to them to read.

...Telling me "No" when I sit next to him on the Piano. He needs to sit there alone and play it by himself.

I just wanted to share a few here because the list goes on and on and I think only Richard and I enjoy going through all of them in detail, beaming with pride as we review all of Aaron's new antics.

Its just amazing to watch how he learns things and also to marvel at the things he has picked up without being taught. I'm torn between wanting to keep him a baby and helping him to develop into an independent little boy. I know there is nothing I can do to stop him from growing up but sometimes I really wish he would do it a little slower.

Breastfeeding in Church

Yes, I've finally done it. I never thought I would dare to but today, the perfect opportunity arose.

We went to St Michael's Church today and it has a 'Cry Room'. I've always found that term a little offensive and used to say 'My baby isn't crying' whenever the wardens asked me to take Aaron to the room.

Anyway, Aaron is no longer the little baby that I can keep quiet in the sling. The 'Cry Room' is actually a good place for him now. Its a sectioned off glass area that cuts down the noise that children make but still allows everything that is happening in the main part of the church to be heard.

Initially, we were the only ones in the room today and I didn't turn the lights on. The glass is tinted so we could see out of it but the congregation couldn't really see us inside. I thought Aaron was reasonably well behaved in there. He marched around inspecting every corner of the room. Then he sat down to do some drawing. Eventually, two other families with little girls came into the room and Aaron tried to make friends.

When Aaron failed to engage the girls in any play, he eventually found his way to me, lay down on my lap and asked for a drink. I happily obliged because everybody was facing the front and nobody should be looking around anyway. I couldn't believe I was breastfeeding during Mass. My mind kept thinking of what I would say if somebody approached me at that time or maybe after mass.

"I'm sure Mother Mary breastfed Jesus"

"I thought the whole idea of the 'Cry Room' was to keep Mass times as quiet as possible"

"God made my body this way to feed babies"

I didn't need to face any grown ups. The only person that took any interest in what Aaron was doing was one of the little girls. She looked really puzzled! I actually gave him three short feeds during Mass.

When Mass was over, I felt good that I managed to pay attention to most of it and at least pray more than I usually did. We didn't have to deal with a baby that kept wanting to go outside. Neither did I have to deal with a baby that was constantly tugging at my shirt. This is another situation where I've been thankful for how convenient breastfeeding is and how easy it is to calm a baby down. It just happened that I did it in a place where I think most people would prefer I didn't. But, they don't have to know.

Ta Ta 2007

As usual, the year has just zoomed past. Why does time past so quickly? I don't remember it being this way when I was a child? Its as if there is a hard slog to get to the top of a hill (end of adolescence) and then after that, its a downhill run from adulthood to....the end!

It has been an extremely eventful year with the move to Indonesia, holiday in Bali AND two and a half months in Brisbane. And don't forget the couple of trips back to Malaysia that we also had. No matter how much I dislike AirAsia (thats the budget airline I use), its thanks to their cheap fares that I've been able to have so many trips.
On top of all the travel, I have the ever evolving Aaron to keep me on my toes. He has definitely provided us with a continuous stream of new experiences and amazement. I know I make everything revolve around him and I mark each stage of my own life based on what he's doing but I'm comfortable with my life being that way for now.

Here is my mother giving Aaron his first taste of solid food. Photo taken on 19 January.


And here he was yesterday when we were trying out a Dim Sum place.

No wonder 2007 has just disappeared. I wonder what sort of surprises 2008 has for us all.

Happy New Year Everybody. I wish you all a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous 2008!

We're up to 132

car, busy (he uses this to mean 'driving'), walk, water, Wiggles, Aaron, xie xie ('Thank You' in Chinese), eat, play, jatuh ('fall' in Indonesian), pray, bubbles, key ...

If Aaron could blog, those would be just 13 out of the possible 132 words that he can choose to use now. Its amazing! It was only on October 30 that I was marveling at his first few words. His pronunciation still isn't correct but its good enough for us to know what he's saying. Sometimes, he uses the words by themselves. Other times, he uses his signs only. And then other times again, its a combination of both. Bottom line is that his communication skills have really kicked in.

My favorite combination of signs and speech is when he slaps his chest with both hands splayed wide and then says 'sit' to tell me to get off his little chair so he can sit. I usually ask for a 'Please' but I'll get a 'Pees' instead. You'll have to trust me when I say it is really cute!

I Googled toddler speech development and supposedly, by the time he's 18 months, he'll pick up 10 new words a day. And shortly after that he could even pick up a new word every 90 mins! I think there are a few bad habits I'd better break RIGHT NOW.

The Shopping Cart Cover

The Good News:
I finally got to use the Shopping Cart cover. It has been semi-finished for several weeks but I didn't have the elastic to put in until today. So, here it is:


The Bad News:
Aaron kept trying to pull it off the cart. It took a long time before he would allow himself to be distracted by other things. And then, he'd just start trying to pull it off again. He did settle down a little by the time we got to the checkout so maybe he'll get used to it.

OR, maybe this is going to be payback for my own childhood. Apparently, my mother made me several dresses that I refused to wear.

Babies are just so honest. If they don't like something, they immediately let you know. There is no faking it or trying to say something nice just to avoid hurting someone. No cover ups. And the best part to their honesty is that we all love them for it. I wonder when we start wearing our masks and sometimes even resenting people for their honesty.

Sleep Laughing

Some time ago, I posted on Aaron and his night terrors. Last night, we saw the opposite. Richard and I were watching Aaron and laughing (quietly) at sleep posture. He still tucks his hands and legs in and sticks his backside in the air the same way he did when he was a few weeks old.


So, while we were laughing, he must have heard us because he lifted his head, opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Oh No! Now I'll have to deal with his crying and have to put him to sleep again"

No, that didn't happened, he actually started laughing. Then he put his head down again and kept chuckling and finally, just had the sweetest smile on his face as he closed his eyes. There were a few more chuckles before he was completely quiet again. It was the strangest thing. Just like the night terrors, I don't think he was really awake even though his eyes were opened.

I wouldn't mind a few more of these cute episodes!

A Day of Firsts

Why is he grabbing his shorts? Probably because he's feeling a little airy in there :) Today was Aaron's had his first hour without a nappy. I know that many people, especially Asians, do toilet train babies from a very young age but I haven't felt ready to do it until now. There was just too much going on when Aaron was younger.

I started taking him to the toilet after his afternoon nap a few weeks ago and now, he regularly 'goes' at that time. I should really take him for pee breaks every hour but he keeps changing his schedule and I haven't been successful at catching the non post-nap pees. He has told me twice after a nap that he needed to go so I'm taking that as a good sign and that he's recognizing what it feels like. Hopefully, a daily nappy free hour will help me identify any cues he may be giving off and also speed up the recognition in his own mind of when he should make a run for the bathroom.

As for training on No. 2s....well, he had trained himself at 11 months but somehow, when we went to Australia and then came back again, things seemed to have gone backwards to the point where he now avoids eye contact and pretends that nothing has happened after he's done it. He'll make extra efforts in his play just to avoid having to get cleaned up. No idea on this one at the moment so I'm going to leave it for now.

The other 'First' of the day is his own chair. Here he is on his big boy chair (even though its a really little one).

I want to grow up to be a Wiggle

Its really starting to look like the 30 mins of TV a day is becoming Aaron's favorite time. And the Wiggles, his favorite people.

He's like this throughout all the singing parts of the DVD. I love watching him! This is from the Mariachi Wiggles part.


The Tupperware on his head is because the Wiggles were wearing hats and he NEEDED one too. Noisms once commented that I shouldn't torture Aaron with Tap Dancing Lessons but look.....that's his natural dance style :)

Baby Steps with the Pantley Pull Off

After the awful experience of 'sleep training' a couple of weeks ago, I've gone back to what I've always believed. Only gentle ways to encourage Aaron to learn to sleep on his own. No more fast forwarding the process.

Elizabeth Pantley's book 'The No Cry Sleep Solution' has a huge following and plenty of online forums dedicated to the discussion of it. There really is no crying involved in the various methods that she uses but they all need patience and perseverance. I wish I didn't get impatient and try to merge Pantley and Ferber (he's the father of controlled crying).

I've been using the Pantley Pull Off for several months BUT I was not consistent. I had no patience nor perseverance. The PPO is a strategy of unlatching the baby at progressively earlier times. You start off unlatching when the baby is fully asleep. If the baby wakes, then you just let him/her latch on again (no fuss/crying). 30-60 seconds later, you unlatch. After about 3-5 times, the baby will get the idea and just continue sleeping. So, you keep doing this at every sleep until the baby does not root for the breast when you unlatch. Then you move up the unlatching to when the baby is only half asleep and repeat the same process. After that, its when the baby is drowsy and then finally, no feeding to sleep. Voila! Its supposedly as simple as that but you can see how it takes patience and perseverance.

Well, I'm determined to give this method a proper go. No more cheating. I'm up to the half asleep baby now and I think Aaron's cold is helping out because his stuffy nose is making it hard for him to suck anyway.

Eew! Whats next?!

*WARNING - Gross Post because of Gross Day*

There are three incidents in Aaron's life so far that really stand out in my memory. Yes, there are plenty of lovely, happy and cute memories that I often blog about but today, I'm talking about the other type of memory. The kind that forms because you were either shocked, 'eew-ed' (meaning repulsed but in a kinder sense), or both.

The first happened one night when I went to pick him up for his 10pm feed. I was giving him a little cuddle when I felt that his shirt was wet. I thought there was a bit of a sourish smell as I entered the room but had dismissed it. Now, that thought came back and as I looked down at his white shirt, I see a big stain across the front. WHAT?! How did all that pee get up there? Oh No...Pee would have been GOOD. To cut a long story short. It was actually an exploded diaper full of poop that migrated EVERYWHERE and has now transfered to me as well. *SHOCKED AND EEEW!*

The second happened not long after that first incident. Aaron had a really upset stomach and it transformed him into a machine gun with poopy ammunition. It fired with or without the diaper on and I ended up jumping out of harms way quite a few times because of the distance he managed. It was annoying to clean up that mess all day long but you've got to see the humor in it. After the first incident, I was no longer eew-ed. Just *SHOCKED*

Today, I formed the third memory and it has nothing to do with poop. Aaron has had a pretty bad cold for the past few days. It hasn't slowed him down at all but his nose has been like a tap. Today, he stopped letting us wipe his nose. Maybe it hurt. There was no way I could get a tissue or handkerchief near him. It would just drip and he would smear it with the back of his hand all over his face. Then he'd examine his hand or he'd stick his tongue out to try to taste it. Just really really gross stuff. The EEW memory forming came when I used my hand to clean him up and found that he was ok with that. I've had to do that all day! I'm not shocked that I had to do this but I had a big 'EEW' blinking in my brain the whole time. Long, sticky, gooey, finger clinging snot. You may think that this is nothing compared to poop but when you've got all ten fingers entangled.....*EEW*

Enjoy the Freedom of Babyhood

Last Monday, I watched the National Geographic documentary, My Brilliant Brain. The main point that I took away from that hour was that while there are gifted children out there who are born with the propensity to excel in certain areas, ALL children can be nurtured to have the same hunger for learning that gifted children do. That was supposedly one of the characteristics of a gifted child/person - they love to learn.

All of us are born with that spongy brain that absorbs everything but many children lose that inherent thirst for knowledge. I noticed this with some children I taught from the time they were 5 till 7. Prior to going to school, they wanted to learn everything. However, after half a year in the first grade, I started hearing things like "I'm too lazy", "I can't", "I don't want to" etc.

So what have I been doing this week? Going overboard with trying to find 'educational' games I can play with Aaron. Incorporating, colors, shapes, names, numbers, alphabets, music, into everything. Don't get me wrong, all that is good. I need the over enthusiasm so that when it dies down, I'll still have a lot of it.

But as it is Friday, and I think about how quickly the time has slipped away, I can't help feeling that I just want to enjoy Aaron being a baby. I noticed today that he doesn't suck his fingers or gnaw on everything he can get his hands on anymore. I did nothing to stop those habits yet they disappeared. He's also able to drink from a normal cup, with supervision of course. He tells me that he wants his bath. He's growing up!

I really need to remember to enjoy each day with him even while I try to prepare him for the future. Doesn't it sound silly to 'prepare' a baby for the future? As if it were an examination. Its a competitive world these days and he'll be in it soon enough. Now is the time for the both of us to just enjoy the complete freedom of babyhood at home.

Who is Amanda?

My parents may have named me Amanda but they either call me Manda or girl. Richard also calls me Manda. My brother calls me Che (Cantonese for elder sister) or hey! Most of my friends also call me Manda but some do pronounce the 'A' at the beginning. Many people in Malaysia call me Armarndar (and sometimes even ARMADA) because the 'A' sounds there are 'Ar'. Then over here in Indonesia, most people call me 'Ibu'. The literal translation is 'Mother' but it is also a respectful term that you use for married women. If they think I'm younger and unmarried, they call me something that sounds like 'Bark'. Haven't figured that one out yet.

So, when we asked Aaron 'Who is Amanda?', he was rightfully puzzled. After all, he has never heard that word before. We just laughed at him and left it. This was on Sunday.

Yesterday, while we were in the car, Aaron said something like 'Namnanda'. I looked at him and he said it again. I laughed and he laughed and he said it some more. At that time, I wasn't sure if he was testing the name on me or just testing out some new sounds he heard.

Today, he looked straight at me and said it again. Namnanda. I think he knows its my name. But how did he figure it out?

These babies, they're sneaky. They KNOW things. Don't underestimate them and don't say things you don't want them to hear in front of them.

Orange top, Dark Green shorts, Blue and Yellow shoes

Unfortunately, I have no photo of this because we arrived home late and Aaron was too tired for anything but a bath and sleep.

But can you imagine those colours together? Orange, Dark Green, Blue and Yellow. Thats what his father dressed him in.

Yes, he's only 15 months and I'm definitely not a fashionista but his clothes still need to match. Right?

As it is, the baby shops stock inventory as if there were only baby girls born everyday. Cute fairy outfits, purple mary jane shoes, tiny denim skirts. You name it, they've got it for the girls.

I was a just telling a friend just last week, little boys have to rely on their faces and personalities to be cute because the shops definitely aren't helping in terms of outfits. So, Aaron may have the face and the act together but I still don't want him to go around looking as if we didn't put any thought into dressing him. Its not that I'm one to follow the latest trends and I definitely don't fall into any fashionable category myself but I want Aaron to grow up knowing how to match. This seems to be a skill that all the men in my family lack.

Side note: I was just thinking to myself that blogging is so much fun because it is such a convenient medium for putting whatever thoughts you have out there. Like today, when my brain is a little tired from thinking about Captain Picard's Christmas Party, but I would still like to have my daily post up, I can do one on an everyday thing like matching a baby's clothes.

Sleep Training - Who needs it?!

Aaron fell into the habit of feeding to sleep when he was around 6 months old. At that time, it really felt like a gift because prior to that, we'd be rocking and walking him for anywhere up to 3 hrs before he fell asleep. The feeding to sleep gave us all some much needed rest.

He still feeds to sleep now. I don't have a problem with it because I need to give him a feed before bed anyway. He just calmly falls asleep after he's had enough. No fuss. Just peaceful slumber in the arms of his Mama.

So why would I even want to try to get him to sleep on his own? I don't know. Because its the thing to do? Because people keep telling me that its time? I basically have no reasons of my own.

Yet, I've tried it for two days now. Yesterday was encouraging because after 30 seconds of protest, Aaron was happy to play around the bed and then 30 mins later, fell asleep without much fuss. Today, I had 30 mins of screaming, kicking, tears, begging, rolling and having to look at his extremely hurt and rejected face. In the end, I caved and fed him. He was so distraught he sobbed for some time before drifting of to sleep.

I don't think I can continue to do this. Its too heartbreaking. Many people don't realize just how secure and comforting breastfeeding is from a baby's perspective. Yes, they do get the pacifying effect from it but they also feel rejected and confused if they are suddenly refused a feed. I'll have to try some other way. Go back to the Pantley pull off perhaps. There is no short cut to this. I'm not going to have him go sleep so miserably every night when he's such a perfectly happy child.

A future elf to clean, cook and fetch?

Its not just Santa who has elves helping him out at this time of the year. It looks like I have a little elf developing very quickly in my own home too.

Monkey see, monkey do ALL the time now. Here he is doing some cleaning. He'll also ask for the ladle so he can 'cook' and when we say its time to go out, he'll go fetch my shoes for me. I know, I'm a proud Mama. But I can't help it. He even tries to arrange his own little shoes in pairs, side by side!

Aaron's Christmas Story

Aaron's grandmother bought him a book from the Little Golden Book series before we left Brisbane. It was 'The Christmas Story' and for the past two weeks, its his favorite book. He pours over this book cover to cover. We go through it 3298 times a day from front to back and back to front again. And, don't forget looking at every detail on the front and back covers. Like I said, COVER TO COVER.

I usually point to the pictures and tell him who they are and then its his turn to point at things. Yesterday, something funny started happening. He would point at the baby in the manger and then point to himself and say 'Aaron'. After pointing at the baby, he will point to Mary and then point to me and say 'Mama'. I can't figure out if he's identifying with the baby or he really wants to be part of the story! Maybe he recognized the mother-baby relationship. Who knows? I just found it so cute that he's conveniently found himself such a choice part in book.

The identification doesn't end there. He found the parish newspaper lying around and it had some different images of Mary and Jesus. Once again, he called them Mama and Aaron. Funny little guy!

The Drain Woman in me

I'm loud and I know it. Not over the top loud but just not 'girly'. I talk loudly, laugh loudly and hardly whisper. This is what my mother tells me. She also has this theory that its because there was a group of "Hung Koi Por" outside our house everyday when I was learning to speak.

"Hung Koi Por" is Cantonese for "Drain Woman". In the late seventies, we lived in Ipoh, Malaysia and all the houses there had an open drain (not the gross kind) running along the front. They were clean enough for my brother and I to play in when I was about five. They were this clean because the "Drain Women" worked on them everyday. Keeping the grass out of it, stopping any weeds from growing and clearing out any rubbish that might have fallen in. They always worked in groups and of course would chat. LOUDLY.

So now, my mother keeps telling me to keep it down or I'll pass on my Drain Woman ways to Aaron. I can't control it though, its just my natural voice volume. And if I'm excited....I get really loud. At least I don't go high pitched. When I laugh, I prefer the open-mouthed, full forced, laugh with all my strength type. There's no fun in a muffled chuckle.

It might be too late for Aaron anyway. He has started to throw his head back and lets out really loud laughs. I wonder where he picked THAT up from?! And for a few days now, he sometimes carries on his babbling with the volume turned WAY UP. Its so funny to watch and listen to. I guess I encourage it too but I really don't want to button up that enthusiasm.

Here he is making some sort of basketball grunt! He must have seen that in the park...I don't do that!

I am HAPPY

I'm feeling extremely happy and contented this evening. There was nothing special about today but I somehow have this feeling of being blessed. Its strange to feel thankful and grateful without anything specific triggering the feeling.

Now that I've started blogging about it, there is a thought forming in my head that perhaps it is due to a photo of a newborn. Earlier today, I was looking at some photos of an old friend and her new baby. Actually, she's the sister of one of my best friends and I haven't been in touch with her (the mother) for years. Therefore, I know nothing of what she's like now, how her pregnancy was or how she was feeling about the upcoming birth. Nothing that would influence my thoughts as I looked at her photos.

However, there was this one photo of her looking at the baby where I could see how thrilled she was to be holding such a precious gift. I think I recognized in her face, the same awe and amazement that I felt when Aaron was a day old. That flashback must have released a batch of happy hormones in me. I never imagined that such a cheeky little 24hr responsibility would be able to have such a positive impact on me.

The happy feelings don't end with Aaron either. I just have this general thankful feeling for:
1) The family I have
2) The few good friends who have stuck around over the years
3) The peace that I have enjoyed my whole life
4) The privileges I had growing up
5) The comfortable life I lead
6) The little luxuries I can afford

Have a Happy Day!

Violence does breed violence (except in my brother and me)

My mother used to buy these rattan canes that were hung threateningly around the house. I remember standing next to my brother with our mother sitting in front of us. She'd have the cane in hand and go through the list of all our evils. At the same time, she'd have us pulling on our earlobes and we'd be there with both hands pulling down hard. After all the crimes were recited, she'd ask for one hand. And we would, dutifully, stick an upturned palm out and she would flick the cane down (I'd like to say 'with all her might' but she didn't). Sometimes, it would be a flick for each misdemeanor. At the very very end, she'd say that we were banned from the Idiot Box for 1 week. That was the WORST part of the punishment.

Thinking back on this, I can't figure out why were were SO STUPID to stand there, pull our ears and then stick our hands out. It would happen every so often and each time, we'd do it even though we knew what was coming.

Anyway, I did try smacking Aaron some time ago when nappy changes were a nightmare but that didn't go so well. It didn't help me get the nappies on any more easily and instead, he started slapping me whenever he didn't get things his way. (Now how come we didn't do that to my mother?) Thankfully, he's forgotten all about that.

These days I just use my voice and then tap Aaron on his hand or leg or whichever body part is the offender. He gets the idea. For now.

So, today, when Aaron was pulling down the photos that I had stuck up in his room, I said 'Don't do that'. He just turned around, pulled another one off and tapped his own hand! I know I'm not supposed to but how could I keep a straight face? He had such a cheeky grin on his face while doing it too.