Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Aaron - A Super Big Brother
Today, I realized that if I ever want to get an idea of my day-to-day parenting habits, all I need to do is watch Aaron with Adrian. The thing is, I really don't want to know that I'm snappy or stern but I must be because I watched Aaron be that way to Adrian today. Aaron is super helpful and completely aware of how much work goes into each day with the two of them. Throughout these school holidays, he has been toggling between being a five year old that frequently does not hear his mother speaking to being a five (going on thirty five) year old that tries to take on some of the day-to-day parenting of his younger brother.
I've watched Aaron get Adrian's clothes out and change him in the mornings, feed him meals, take him to the bathroom, read to him, wipe his nose and all sorts of other things. Its heartwarming to watch. I never imagined that Aaron would grow to be so caring towards Adrian. Here he is carrying Adrian (12 hours old) for the first time.
I'm sure you're all wondering what I've been doing since he does all the work here but I assure you, this is not an all day affair - he toggles, remember. As I was saying, its all lovely to watch until Aaron tries to get Adrian to do something that he doesn't want to do. Immediately, I hear Aaron use the same tone that I now realize I use. Its much too stern and sometimes sounds snappy and cold. I have heard threats as well, which reminds me that I don't want to be that mother.
We were talking about nephews and nieces and Aaron mentioned that my brother has no nieces. And then he said "I don't think he'll ever get a niece because I don't think we want any more children. Adrian is enough." I must have unknowingly been putting some expectation on Aaron. Its good that he's a responsible little boy but I wouldn't want him to feel burdened by it all or one day resent Adrian for making his life harder.