Knocked Out!

Aaron was such a terrible sleeper as a baby that until today, I am still amazed to watch him sleep. This is especially the case if he falls asleep outside his bed.

We took him to a huge indoor playground at a mall recently. That place was any child's heaven! There were ramps, tunnels, multiple ball pools and best of all, the slides looked like they were 3 floors tall.

Aaron was non-stop in there for nearly three hours. He really wasn't faking it when he told me that he couldn't walk out to the car. We no longer use a stroller with him and he's too heavy to be carried so the best I could offer was a shopping trolley.

Literally 2 minutes after I put him in there, this is what I see...



Oh, the pink striped socks? The playground insisted that all kids and parents wore socks so, they were the cheapest pair I could find in the nearby shops. He didn't seem to mind.


Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Is She Really Your Mother?

My regular readers may remember me mentioning how straightforward the people of Palembang are. Well, my mother have met quite a few straightforward people over here in Malaysia too.

A family joke we have from when I was a child is that I was picked up from the rubbish bin. (No, this hasn't had any adverse effects on me.) I don't look very much like my parents at all. In fact, many people question if I am even the same race as them. I really don't mind this at all and have had lots of fun with it over the years. (Except for one Ramadan month in primary school when I was questioned for not fasting.)

Over the past week, my mother and I have been asked multiple times if we were related. Here are a couple of examples of what happens.

The first instance was at a hawker center. The lady who delivered our food looked at me and asked if I was my mother's daughter-in-law. When my mother said that I was her daughter, that lady actually spent a few minutes insisting that I couldn't possibly be because I didn't look anything like my mom.

Next was a shop assistant in a bookstore. After spending nearly 15 minutes helping us track down a book, the guy looks at us and says "How are you two related?" Once again, he's not satisfied with the answer and acts like we're pulling his leg.

So you see, people here in Malaysia are just as straightforward as those in Palembang. How could I have forgotten?

Anyway, the conversation that takes the cake for this sort of assumption and straight talk actually happened a few years ago.

My mother and her mother happened to drop me off at a cosmetics counter. I had purchased some product and the lady was giving me a free facial. So, as she worked on exfoliating and cleansing my face, she jumped straight into some sort of soliloquy of how it is a blessing to be adopted. I distinctly remember her telling me that it is because my mother loved me that she wanted to adopt me. She assured me that I shouldn't feel bad about this and told me that I should even appreciate them more.

Er....just because I purchased something from you doesn't make you my new BFF!

I know the lady only meant well and I wasn't offended at all. Just highly amused. She talked non stop so I didn't have a chance to correct her. At least she can feel that she perhaps did some sort of a good deed that day.

St Michael's Catholic Church, Ipoh - Young Families Beware

This is not a new topic for me but I just have to have a bit of a rant here. The "Cry Room" at St Michael's Church here in Ipoh is still one of my pet peeves of this city even though my last post on the topic was over a year ago.

I have avoided going there as much as possible but I always end up there at least once during each visit to Ipoh. And each time I go, the sight the cry room and attitudes of the wardens and parish priest disgust me so much that I leave Mass feeling angry, frustrated and slightly revengeful.

Since my last post, I have purposely not entered that room whenever I go to Mass at St Michael's. Each time, I have a similar conversation with the wardens:

Warden: We have a cry room.
Me: He's not crying.
Warden: But he might.
Me: But he's not.
Warden: Father says children have to go there.
Me: I'll sit out here.

On Sunday, after a hectic weekend in Kuala Lumpur and a 2 hour car ride back to Ipoh, I felt that I just wasn't up to the stress of joining the general congregation. You can't imagine the pressure I feel each time I sit on the "outside" with Aaron.

So, I walked guiltily into the "Cry Room". I felt that I was betraying myself and all the rants I've had about this horrid room. But I was tired and thought it might be the solution.

I was shocked to find that the already too small room was half its original size. I don't know what the history is there but it was cramped yesterday. And, here is the view from where we sat.



Look at the reflections on the glass obscuring the view of the outside. Also, from this angle, we have no view of the alter at all. We also could not see the projection of the hymns and prayers.

Tell me, how are parents supposed to participate? How will kids learn about the mass?

Also, the parish priest may not know about kids but he must have "people" that can tell him. Children put together in a small, confined space WILL interact. They look at each other, they know they can make some noise in there. They will try to play. Noise levels will rise. Parents will try to control this. Kids will rebel.

Tell me, how will children know that Mass is not a place to seek out playmates when there is a room full of them?

During the homily, a two year old fell down and hit her head on the pew. Of course, she screamed. On the outside, and without any knowledge of what happened, the parish priest gave a look to one of the wardens to evict the girl. He also remarked that during his time, no child would dare to throw a tantrum like that. And that today, the louder he talks, the louder she screams.

Tell me, how would you feel if you were the parents? (Hopefully infuriated)

Children are the future of the church. During Baptism, their parents swore to bring them up to be believers. It is also the responsibility of the church to nurture both parents and children. Not make them feel alienated. The family yesterday ended up spending the remainder of Mass outside.

Tell me, wouldn't the thought cross their minds to just give up on Mass until the child is older?

The "Cry Room" is alienating and ineffective. It is plain stoopid since it isn't even sound proof! Noise levels rise. The priest will look over. Some of the general congregation will look. And, the Cry Room has failed in its No.1 Mission - To avoid distraction of the general congregation.

My suggestion - get rid of it! They didn't have it during Jesus' time. They didn't have it when this Parish Priest was a two year old. We don't need it now!

Aaron is proof that children can be no more distracting that other members of the congregation if given the chance. I was weak yesterday and went in the room but he was a perfect angel in there. I could have stayed out. He knew that it wasn't right to be playing and talking during Mass.

IF the St Michael's parish really have a problem with families with young children during mass, then why not dedicate one of the masses just for that crowd. Everyone can sit outside, participate, learn about the mass and enjoy community prayer.

My Absolute Favourite Food

For this week's Photostory Friday, I'm featuring my favourite food - Steamed Freshwater Prawns. These are steamed with Chinese cooking wine and a little bit of egg.



I like these so much that I always finish my rice first so that I can concentrate solely on them. I use my fingers to peel the shells off even when they are still hot. And then, after savoring all the prawns, I just let my fingers air dry. Yes, it may sounds gross but I like the smell of the prawns on my fingers for a little while after the meal. Anyway, I don't touch anyone and I usually wash my hands by the time I get home.

The prawns in the above photo are on the small side but its all thats available these days. We used to get them as big as my palm but I guess I'm not the only one who loves them so much.

The bigger restaurants in the cities have large ones but these are all farmed and full of antibiotics. I don't go for those. We had these in a small town, Gopeng, outside Ipoh where the people still go to the rivers to catch the prawns.

The restaurant is part of a bus station. Its an extremely humble establishment but the food there is amazing (of course!). The prices were incredibly reasonable too.




Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

p.s. I'll be going to Kuala Lumpur for the next three days so my next post will be on Monday. Have a good weekend!

I Miss The Everyday Things

It used to be that we couldn't wait to get out of Palembang, but starting sometime in the middle of last year, it really started to feel like home. I don't think Richard feels this way about the place but Aaron and I certainly do. In fact, its probably Aaron's only home because that is where he does most of his growing up.

The strange thing is that its all the little things that we miss. Things like...

...Our daily routine of waking up at 5am. We get so much done before 8am over there. I feel efficient!

...Watering my garden. Its in no way a special or even a flourishing garden but I enjoy taking care of it. Richard told me that the Okra I planted before leaving Palembang are now producing fruit....I wish I was there.

...Tempeh. Simple, pan-fried tempeh.

...My routine with Aaron - Breakfast, gardening, drawing, legos, writing, reading, napping etc. We also have many more play stations within the house there. More toys of course, but also more books.

Over the past 10 years, I have moved from Brisbane, to Penang, to Klang and finally to Palembang. They all have the population of cities (with Palembang being the most populous) but you may notice that each subsequent place is seemingly less developed.

Just take the shower situation for example. Brisbane has the usual "Western" shower in shower stall setup. Penang was a notch down from that with no real shower stall but still a shower curtain. Klang was a shower in a cramped bathroom with no partition for showering area so everything got wet. Now in Palembang, I just throw a bucket of water over myself. Thankfully, its still within the confines of a bathroom and not out by the river!

Anyway, my point here is that I find that I have more of an affinity to each place I move to than the last place. Even I find this a little odd because each place has less to offer than the last in terms of weekend activities, entertainment and even everyday conveniences.

Palembang is (by far) the most simple of all the places. I'm ashamed to admit that during my first year there, I would have called it the most boring place on Earth. I told everyone not to visit me because there was nothing there. Perhaps it was because I disliked the place so much and stripped my expectations of the place down to zero that I ended up enjoying its simplicity.

Its funny how a place can secretly grow on you.

Aaron Sleeps Through But I Don't !

My sleep patterns have been completely out of synch lately. And this time, I can't blame Aaron. He sleeps through 10 or more hours every night now!

On the other hand, I'm either taking about 2 hours to fall asleep OR waking up at about 2am and staying awake till nearly 4am. It is so annoying. I'm tired, I'm even sleepy, but I just won't fall asleep.

When Aaron was the lousy sleeper, I used to nurse him back to sleep. The upside of always needing to do that was the nursing hormones. They not only put him to sleep but me as well! I've always taken a long time to fall asleep but when we were still nursing, it was a piece of cake.

These days, I'm back to the old routine of taking forever to get to dreamland. And on top of that, when I do fall asleep, I wake up again in a couple of hours and have to repeat the whole process again.

Its not as if I have a big problem to stress over that I'm being kept awake. In fact, the most trivial of thoughts come to mind as I lay awake. Take last night for example: I kept wondering about how I would get my Rubik's Cube back from a neighbor in Palembang. He's an 8 year old boy and I let him borrow it for the duration of my stay here in Ipoh. But I've extended my stay. Maybe he'll think its his permanently. Maybe, he has tossed it out. Maybe, maybe, maybe....Its just a stoopid Rubik's Cube. GO TO SLEEP!

Oh yes, the other thing I tend to think about when I can't sleep is food. This is something I haven't had in a while so, I think about it quite a bit - Curry Noodles with Chinese Roast Pork.



I've tried exercising, not exercising, having a warm drink, not having a drink, repetitive prayer, emptying my mind (this one is hard), whatever!

Its a vicious cycle because by 1pm the next day, I'm sleepy and I have to put Aaron down for his nap. Very often, I end up falling asleep very easily at that time but I'm stopping that now. Its not going to help my night sleeping. So here I am, new blogging time.

Sand - A Solution To The Te*r*ble Twos

My title has the two asterisks there because Aaron's second year has been pretty good, and, I didn't want to call it "te*r*ble". Of course, I totally understand why two year olds have been given that label and the past year has certainly been challenging but it wasn't all that bad.

Anyway, over the weekend, we went to Penang. This is an island city about 1.5hrs drive from Ipoh. The sole purpose of going there was to let Aaron play on the beach.

As I sat there with him from 8am to 12noon on Sunday, I noticed that I didn't really need to do anything. Mostly, I just sat there, enjoying the view. Occasionally, Aaron would say something to me and I'd answer him. He wasn't all that interested in swimming in the sea so I didn't have to worry about that. It was the easiest 4 hours I've ever spent with him.

If I had known this earlier, I would have planned many more trips to the beach over the past year. Or maybe a sand pit at home!