Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Body Types Renamed

Just last week, a friend and I were having a discussion about ourselves being apples and pears. As of now, the underwear giant, Triumph, is trying to re-label women according to famous artists. So, technically, if I was previously a pear, I'm now Botticelli. Unfortunately, the famous Botticelli celebrity is Beyonce and well.....I don't exactly look like that. I might be more of a Da Vinci these days but then, I'm no Jennifer Aniston either.

The move to re-label came after a survey found that women weren't happy with their curves being described in terms of fruits. The fruits were self deprecating but the artists are meant to lift one's self esteem. Strangely, it was easier to label myself when it was less positive. Its not that I liked calling myself a pear or banana or whatever but it was easier to say than "Hey, I've got a body like Beyonce/Jenifer Aniston!"

Anyway, here are the new definitions:

RAPHAEL

Used to be: Inverted triangle
Shape: Bigger up top with broad shoulders and/or buxom bust and a comparatively smaller waist and hips
Celebrity: Libby Tricket

RUBENS

Used to be: Apple
Shape: Well-proportioned and carry weight around the midsection
Celebrity: Susannah Constantine (Trinny and Susannah)

DA VINCI
Used to be: Banana or straight
Shape: Features classic lines, pretty much straight up and down, giving an elegant form
Celebrity: Jennifer Aniston

BOTTICELLI
Used to be: Pear
Shape: Bottom heavy, bigger around the hips and bottom than the bust region
Celebrity: Beyonce

REMBRANDT
Used to be: Hourglass
Shape: A smaller waist with a fuller bust and bottom.
Celebrity: Scarlett Johansson

Matisse
Shape: Narrow shoulders and hips, you may have a wider midriff and carry some weight in your upper legs
Celebrity: Kate Winslet

Here's the newsclip. Watch to the end for some new artists...

2 comments:

Mike said...

I'll never remember any of the new names.

Bilbo said...

It could be worse...you could be a Picasso - composed of oddly-colored and placed random shapes that make no asethetic sense.