Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Love and Logic Experiments

I recently read the book "Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood. Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years" by Jim Fay and Charles Fay. Just like any other parenting book, there are concepts and ideas in there that I agree with and those I don't.

So far, I've tried two of the experiments.

Experiment #1:
Aaron sometimes gets so demanding and is testing all limits the limits around here. To deal with the whining, which often escalates to loud crying for whatever it is he wants, I put him in his room and latched the door. Its a screen door so we can see each other. I sat at the computer and read the news while he worked it out. It didn't take long for him to figure out that he needed to be quiet and ask in a "big boy" voice to be let out of the room. I've done this twice and there has been a significant reduction in these power struggles. So, there has been some success here (for now).

Experiment #2:
The second thing I tried was taking the toys that he doesn't pick up and keeping them for a day. In the past, he has been good with picking up his toys but lately, his response time has been incredibly slow. So, as the book suggested, I picked the toys up and kept them away. You can't imagine the noise that followed. I kept wondering if I should put Experiment #1 into action but didn't because that would a 2 for 1 punishment which didn't seem fair. I returned the toys, the following day, just like the book instructed.

I thought Experiment #2 was a fabulous success because for several days afterwards, all I needed to do was reach out my hand towards a toy and he'd come flying in to pick it up. He didn't even want my help!! Fantastic, right?

Nope.

Today, he was back to ignoring my requests to tidy up. So, I picked them up. And there was a lot today. Almost half the toys he regularly plays with are now on top of the fridge and in the tool cupboard. But guess what? No noise. No tantrums. He just says to me "Mama, you can have them 'till tomorrow". Sheesh!

Its now "You can have them back after a few days of picking your own toys up".

This job sure requires frequent upgrades to the protocols! It's hardly been a week and a new version is already needed. And he's still only two.

3 comments:

Bilbo said...

It surely would be easier if the children would read these books and understand how they're supposed to react, wouldn't it? Good luck!

kelly said...

Thanks for the sharing! I probably need to try experiment #2 soon in near future.

Mike said...

LOL - 'you can have them till tomorrow'. Outsmarted by a two year old.